Maintenance

This person - i assume I am one, rather than a hologram, is always up at dawn every day NO MATTER what train wreckage i encounter. And my purpose in life for many years - 10 in this phase of life, has been to photograph and write little essay about the truly interesting piles of twisted metal, and minds...i know none that are 'mindful' except my own.

 

In respect of holograms - a proper science book by Gell Mann late 90s was a far and wide series of interviews with top physicists and other theoretical scientists from mathematicians to astronomers, about what they thought some 'fundamental' nature of' reality' was and the largest cohort  of respondents' views was that we live in some kind of VR state or holloraphic whatever...

Me i adore mine if that is the case. And it is ten times more fun than Candide ever had. And i am constant...meaning every day for 20 years - well barring a little hiccup for a few months back then, I am up at damn exact same state of mind - or rather it just gets more pleasantly energised as the years go on. So if it is a 'hologram' at last the engineers have got their ferkin act together and mine runs jolly smoothly. Alas i cannot say the same for anyone else i meet. And i don't 'meet' people i try  and get to know them well - at a compassionate level - looking for their deeper humanity.

Anyway bully for me. I was listening to a writer speaking to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meghan_Daum

a few days ago - she the ONLY modern essayist and thinker i can tolerate – and i have the last 5 yeas searched far and wide - Rubin/ sam HArris, all their so called  'Intellectual Dark Web' children, are children. especially throw-his-toys-out-of-the-pram Peterson.. professoring  how to set the world the worst ever example having got HIMSELF hooked on prescription medicine then making it somehow someone ese's 'responsibility' (when as a 'professor' of medical science surely he should have known BETTER..in y dusty ittle rural backwater village and small town of being raised...by fellow humble folk at local pubs age 16 ..after  being mentored by loving yeoman old Ralph we knew age 16: nick mum's vallium .. there lies the road to certain ruin...

Anyway, sadly, after three years searchin....i still dont have a few others to join me in this list of great culture  - or better put wisdom... that taught me that if Jordan is  a self pitying melodramatist and incidentally appalling rhetorician - only Meghan is great in that department...with her wry ways..

self taught i add. via mainly great lit, but a little art house cinema too, and a lot of the RARE thing the last 7ish years, truly good radio documentary AND just as important te afternoon play...

thats essentially been destroyed by saccharine pityful crap that now floats on top of everything. Except the very best book of this century - Rachel's Mars Room

Anyway - worst word to start a sentence with ever, even if a few weeks ago i had arise a superb opening sentence to a book on the only interesting person i have met for years - she needs novelising to say the least as there is so much to learn in there, but it wont be for me... to ever say a word. 

Anyway, i work to the seasons. Estelle if you are nozing in ...The  summer i roam and enjoy the bits of the Marches and even into Mid Wales which havent been turned into factory farming concentration camps...or tourist destinations for fat smug motorbike tourers from Midlands...my what a pandemic of them we now have...who incidentally have never read a book. I know as i gently quizz many a week. And now stop my quizzing of anyone again ever.

 

And being as i have never been in a better mood in my life - for months...well three years, but especially the last two months. Off we go - your list will be improved a lt over the next few months.

That said, i can fix anything....except her it seems... and in the winter i fix up  - maintain  wonky oldish laptops so that i have a few which may last the summer me rather wandering rather like George Borrow...but no alcohol involved ever - well i am not a 'recovering' alcoholic like every other teetotal one meets in this truly sick shopping Aisle.. so i can drink normally if i wish  - despite being in my 20s certainly an 'addictive' personality nutjob... though as a professional pilot 20 years(St Exuppery planes only - i went back down from airliners to being St Ex as that form of flight is simply so much more human in a way...to be continued)i had to pass sanity medicals once a year so have never had a screw loose...and had a sanity test in 2010 after the usual Kafkaesque crap you get attacked with in uk....especially if you are a famous free speech  - or better put, anti corruption writing, actual 'activist'  - the word all young silly people steal....activist (never even damaging a flower on the Ministry of Justice's lawn, never mind any personal attack or violent act ever)  means paying a HUGE price in figurative blood... 

 

As Solzhenitsyn found..

Anyway...laptops and chargers and everything so rickety even if i look after everything to the nth degree... keyboards with sticky leys.. internal batteries need changing as everything is crap these days especially new Dell laptops and Lenovos... only a few years old.

Bu,i never give up....and all hardship if you have lovely good real literature in you - not that there has been much for the last 20 years except Rachel..oh yes Ove too.... and a little of 

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/25267912-the-reader-on-the-6-27

 

made me cry at the end..those very best kinds of tears..... and a woman i gave a copy too apparently she cried too, who sadly hadnt read it well as all she could do was cry for herself in the 'pandemic' despite living in the most glorious isolated rural farm up high ever...

 

Books are to make you grow the fuck up...not turn you into infantilised rabbits like the likes of Mrs Oliphant always something to moan about. Or seek a fey attention  through some ‘vulnerability.

I met a yank on Saturday - a grown up.... she didnt mind my extreme scholarly but humane cheek... "so do people read Watership Down in your mad continent..?"

To my shock she knew it well ..

“So that's why you are such a fine mind and also have true life in perspective...and clearly havet taken offence at my supposed 'cheek' all Brits nowadays would tarr one with...simply in what used to be called Socratic dialog to find a sweet harmonious universal truth about the way we are...”

which proved to me. Books fuckin matter ... because that was about the best socratic chat ever - albeit i never speak to young ones...only search for grown up women... and i mean 'grown p' in the mental sense...

 

this must be done rite ...now!

when my laptop keyboard has been changed for a new one... 

well, if that one works any better - Lenovo new 3 years ago CAME with a  faulty keyboard...and despite being a lethal human rights operator  - now give up, no point..i never meet any humans...well especially in uk, life is too sort to bother fighting with them just to have at least ONEhing doing what it says n the box: work..

 

i an guarantee the culture on these pages do.

I was brought up (aside from my beloved RAlph the yeoman had me under his wing)  by the biggest load of lost fraudulent mad hypocrites ever - so so dodgy they were  - i would say later on in my 20s "they took the Times Telegraph and Observer religiously of a Sunday [to show off] ..they clearly never read The Observer.."

I believe especially the books - and above all Silas...but so many more too...served to fix..me 

And 2020 was the year you can throw away all your large library of science books - mine huge...Lee Smolin to the FAR better geneticists than Dawkins such as Lewontin Kamin Rose ..Jay Gould...et al.. cos the superb Lee Smolin became superb at last and did a yotube interview looking a bit 'ill' it as to be said where he admitted " me inventing two strands of string theory...  i can tell you know..it could all be made up hocus pocus we have absolutely not one smidgen of real knowledge as to reality...so maybe folks should concentrate a little more on the beauty of the world we live in...and the LOVE we can sometimes find with our fellow human..beings..."

fuckin A1 ....dont believe any 'expert' ...except me, on what is the culture that doest turn you into a lost angsty prick and maybe just lets you breathe and become a little more.. Socrates - the happy version.